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In the last issue I covered:

The Dreaded Interview – what should I expect and what should I not do?

Different Types of Interview you might meet;

Dealing with Interview Nerves;

Assessment Centres - what are they?

Psychometric Test;

Body Language - the Unspoken Clues;

The 3 Unbreakable Rules.

In this month's issue we're talking about:

• What do you look like?

• Take the worry out of presentations.

• Assert yourself.

What do you look like? Present yourself successfully

How to Dress for an Interview
By Sheila Dicks

The dress code in most organizations is as different as the organization itself, so it is impossible to find an outfit that will work well in all interviews. What should you do? Do some investigating and find out how the employees dress and follow their lead but dress just slightly better.

Wear business-like attire, avoiding flashy colours, bold prints, logos and keep jewelry to a minimum. Wear clothes in which you feel comfortable and don't wear skirts that will ride up when you sit. Carry a nice attaché case or folder to hold your resume and examples of your work.

Before you leave home check yourself in a full length mirror and have one last look for rips, runs in stockings (take an extra pair just in case you get a run along the way) and buttons that are about to fall off. A few extra points:

1. Wear a fashionable suit or dressy tailored separates. Make sure they fit well and don't remove the jacket during the interview (don't laugh, I saw this happen).

2. Prepare your clothes for the interview the night before and try it on. Don't leave anything to chance.

3. If you are not wearing a jacket but choose to wear something more casual long sleeves are a must. Sleeveless garments should not be worn in a work environment and certainly not for an interview.

4. Never go without hosiery and don't wear sandals.

5. It has been said that you can look at a person's shoes and determine how wealthy they are - it seems shoes are the last investment. For an interview or business, wear shoes with a closed toe and closed heel and keep them polished without nicked heels or scruffy toes.

6. Pay attention to your hair. A stylish haircut is essential to a professional image.

7. Carry yourself with confidence; stand tall with your shoulders back. Portray a successful image by paying attention to details - tastefully applied makeup, the best garments you can afford and being prepared for the interview.

When you are prepared for the interview, which means knowing the job you have applied for, knowing your resume and how you fit that job, your self-confidence will become apparent. Taking care of how you look will give you one less thing to worry about so you can concentrate on selling your skills.

Don't forget to smile!!

Sheila Dicks is a wardrobe and image consultant who teaches women how to look slimmer by dressing to suit their body type. Visit her at http://www.sheilasfashionsense.com to download a copy of her e-book Image Makeovers and get How to Build a Wardrobe free.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/

Take the Worry Out of Presentations.

This article will help you to prepare well.

Present for Success: Simple Strategies to Add Confidence and Credibility to Your Next Presentation
By Dana Bristol-Smith

Tomorrow’s the day and you’re dreading it. You’re scheduled to give a presentation to the senior management team about the new program you’re proposing. You’re excited and enthusiastic about the program but nervous and anxious about the presentation. You don’t know how you’ll manage to sleep tonight. These thoughts keep running through your mind; What if I stumble? What if I talk too fast? What if they get bored? What if they ask questions and my mind goes blank?

Do any of these sound familiar? If you answered yes, don’t worry! Try some of these simple strategies for your next presentation to help you build confidence and credibility with your audiences.

Developing your presentation

Change the paradigm: Think from your listeners’ perspective.

If you can change your focus from, "What do I want to communicate?" to, "What does the audience need to hear and understand?" you can be a more relevant and engaging presenter. By focusing on your listeners’ needs, rather than on yourself, you can relax and let that focus guide you through the development and delivery of your presentation.

Here are the essential questions that will help you stay on track:

• Who is your audience?

• What is most important to them?

• What is their current level of knowledge on your topic?

• What do they want or need to know about this topic?

If you can’t answer the above questions, it’s important that you do some research to find the answers. If your presentation is an educational or training session, you might want to send out a pre-class questionnaire or survey to learn the current knowledge level of your audience. This can be a simple 5 to 10-question, one-page document that you email or fax. If your presentation is more informational or persuasive, you might want to make some phone calls to learn what you can about your audience.

What’s your objective?

Every presentation you give should have an objective or purpose. Why? Because your objective will help ensure that you stay focused on the topic. And, by defining your objective in the beginning of the development process, you’ll save time.

Structure

Utilize a presentation structure that consists of a beginning, middle and end. In presentation language these components are called the opening, body and close. The purpose of the opening is to introduce yourself and your topic. The opening gives a short preview of the information you plan to cover. You may also want to include some startling data or a quotation. The main purpose of the opening is to get your audiences’ attention. The body of the presentation contains the main ideas and details you want to convey, while the close is the ending. During the close, you may wish to provide a summary of your main points to help the audience remember them. Also, any action items of follow-up information should be in the close.

Delivering your presentation

About nervousness

Most people feel nervous and anxious before giving a presentation. This fear and anxiety can start the minute they’ve been given the assignment and can last until the presentation is over. It’s important that we accept the fact that we’re going to be nervous and learn how to work with it. Try this three-step process developed by Lee Glickstein of Speaking Circles International to ease your nerves:

1. Feel your feet on the ground.

This will help to set a firm foundation for you and has a calming effect.

2. Breathe. And, most importantly, notice that you are breathing.

Most of us when we are nervous or anxious tend to hold our breath and that only makes us feel worse.

3. Speak every word to the eyes and heart of another human being.

Every time you stand in front of any audience, you are building a relationship. If you want people to listen and pay attention to you, you have to listen and pay attention to them. By having a more personal connection with your audience you will develop rapport faster. By looking at people individually, not seeing a group, you can be more relaxed and at ease. Try to have a one-on-one conversation with everyone in the room.

Five strategies to project confidence

1. Reduce your usage of filler words.

Filler words are words that we say unconsciously that add no meaning to our communications. Examples of filler words are um, uh, ah, okay, so, you know, well, but, like, etc. The big problem with filler words is that if you use them frequently, they tend to chip away at your credibility and can make you sound unsure and unprepared. To start reducing usage, you first have to become aware of when and how frequently you use them. The best way to do this is to either audiotape or videotape yourself giving a presentation. Then listen, or better yet, have someone else listen to the tape for filler words. Provide a checklist of filler words and ask the reviewer them count how many you use. It’s fine to use one here and there—using them repeatedly is the problem. Once you have an awareness of which filler words you use, you can start trying to reduce them. Substitute a pause where the filler words would normally occur and your listeners will thank you.

2. Be aware of body language and posture.

Just as mother used to say, stand up straight. Posture is important. Walk with erect posture and confident strides. Also have an awareness of your body language. Show confidence with an open body position. This means hands at your sides not crossed in front of you or hidden in pockets. Keep your hands where the audience can see them and use gestures for emphasis.

3. Remember that you are the expert.

You probably know more than your audience does about your topic. That puts you at an advantage and should instill confidence. Remember, though, to be relevant. You need to know your audience’s level of knowledge on your topic so you can start where they are.

4. Keep your cool when things get hot.

No matter what happens, keep your composure. If you are using technology, be warned: It is bound to malfunction just when you need it most. For peace of mind, have a Plan B ready just in case. If you can think in advance about what might go wrong, and have a contingency plan ready, you can continue and keep your cool. Every presenter has a personal horror story of how the laptop or projector crashed in the middle of their presentation. Be prepared.

5. Have a good time.

If you are having a good time, chances are, so is your audience. Put a smile on your face and be excited and enthusiastic in your delivery. You will breathe life even into dull subjects and help your listeners be engaged in your talk.

The close

I hope you’ll practice some of the strategies listed here. Don’t feel that you have to do all of them during your next presentation. You might want to think about what your biggest presentation challenge is and pick one improvement that you’d like to make. I can guarantee that you’ll feel more confident as you incorporate and practice these suggestions. And remember: Do what you can to enjoy your time at the front of the room and your audiences will enjoy you.

About The Author

Dana is the author of the interactive manual Overcome Your Fear of Public Speaking. Please visit her website http://www.speakforsuccess.net

Dana Bristol-Smith is the founder of Speak for Success, an organization that works with companies that want their people to communicate with confidence and credibility. Companies hire Dana to give skill-building workshops and to provide coaching. She has delivered presentations and training to more than 100,000 people since 1992.

You can reach Dana via email at mail to: dana@speakforsuccess.net

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/

Assert Yourself.

"What I should have said was..."

or "Why on earth did I say..."

What you say to yourself after a situation depends on how well you feel you handled the situation at the time.

This article will give you some good ideas.

Assertive Communication - 6 Tips For Effective Use
By Lee Hopkins

What IS assertive communication?

Assertive communication is the ability to express positive and negative ideas and feelings in an open, honest and direct way. It recognises our rights whilst still respecting the rights of others. It allows us to take responsibility for ourselves and our actions without judging or blaming other people. And it allows us to constructively confront and find a mutually satisfying solution where conflict exists.

So why use assertive communication?

All of us use assertive behaviour at times... quite often when we feel vulnerable or unsure of ourselves we may resort to submissive, manipulative or aggressive behaviour.

Yet being trained in assertive communication actually increases the appropriate use of this sort of behaviour. It enables us to swap old behaviour patterns for a more positive approach to life. I've found that changing my response to others (be they work colleagues, clients or even my own family) can be exciting and stimulating.

The advantages of assertive communication

There are many advantages of assertive communication, most notably these:

• It helps us feel good about ourselves and others

• It leads to the development of mutual respect with others

• It increases our self-esteem

• It helps us achieve our goals

• It minimises hurting and alienating other people

• It reduces anxiety

• It protects us from being taken advantage of by others

• It enables us to make decisions and free choices in life

• It enables us to express, both verbally and non-verbally, a wide range of feelings and thoughts, both positive and negative

There are, of course, disadvantages...

Disadvantages of assertive communication

Others may not approve of this style of communication, or may not approve of the views you express. Also, having a healthy regard for another person's rights means that you won't always get what YOU want. You may also find out that you were wrong about a viewpoint that you held. But most importantly, as mentioned earlier, it involves the risk that others may not understand and therefore not accept this style of communication.

What assertive communication is not...

Assertive communication is definately NOT a lifestyle! It's NOT a guarantee that you will get what you want. It's definately NOT an acceptable style of communication with everyone, but at least it's NOT being aggressive.

But it IS about choice

Four behavioural choices

There are, as I see it, four choices you can make about which style of communication you can employ. These types are:

direct aggression: bossy, arrogant, bulldozing, intolerant, opinionated, and overbearing

indirect aggression: sarcastic, deceiving, ambiguous, insinuating, manipulative, and guilt-inducing

submissive: wailing, moaning, helpless, passive, indecisive, and apologetic

assertive: direct, honest, accepting, responsible, and spontaneous

Characteristics of assertive communication

There are six main characteristics of assertive communication. These are:

• eye contact: demonstrates interest, shows sincerity

• body posture: congruent body language will improve the significance of the message

• gestures: appropriate gestures help to add emphasis

• voice: a level, well modulated tone is more convincing and acceptable, and is not intimidating

• timing: use your judgement to maximise receptivity and impact

• content: how, where and when you choose to comment is probably more important than WHAT you say

The importance of "I" statements

Part of being assertive involves the ability to appropriately express your needs and feelings. You can accomplish this by using "I" statements. These indicate ownership, do not attribute blame, focuses on behaviour, identifies the effect of behaviour, is direcdt and honest, and contributes to the growth of your relationship with each other.

Strong "I" statements have three specific elements:

• Behaviour

• Feeling

• Tangible effect (consequence to you)

Example: "I feel frustrated when you are late for meetings. I don't like having to repeat information."

Six techniques for assertive communication

There are six assertive techniques - let's look at each of them in turn.

1. Behaviour Rehearsal: which is literally practising how you want to look and sound. It is a very useful technique when you first want to use "I" statements, as it helps dissipate any emotion associated with an experience and allows you to accurately identify the behaviour you wish to confront.

2. Repeated Assertion (the 'broken record'): this technique allows you to feel comfortable by ignoring manipulative verbal side traps, argumentative baiting and irrelevant logic while sticking to your point. To most effectively use this technique use calm repetition, and say what you want and stay focused on the issue. You'll find that there is no need to rehearse this technique, and no need to 'hype yourself up' to deal with others.

Example:

"I would like to show you some of our products"
"No thank you, I'm not interested"
"I really have a great range to offer you"
"That may be true, but I'm not interested at the moment"
"Is there someone else here who would be interested?"
"I don't want any of these products"
"Okay, would you take this brochure and think about it?"
"Yes, I will take a brochure"
"Thank you"
"You're welcome"

3. Fogging: this technique allows you to receive criticism comfortably, without getting anxious or defensive, and without rewarding manipulative criticism. To do this you need to acknowledge the criticism, agree that there may be some truth to what they say, but remain the judge of your choice of action. An example of this could be, "I agree that there are probably times when I don't give you answers to your questions.

4. Negative enquiry: this technique seeks out criticism about yourself in close relationships by prompting the expression of honest, negative feelings to improve communication. To use if effectively you need to listen for critical comments, clarify your understanding of those criticisms, use the information if it will be helpful or ignore the information if it is manipulative. An example of this technique would be, "So you think/believe that I am not interested?"

5. Negative assertion: this technique lets you look more comfortably at negatives in your own behaviour or personality without feeling defensive or anxious, this also reduces your critics' hostility. You should accept your errors or faults, but not apologise. Instead, tentatively and sympathetically agree with hostile criticism of your negative qualities. An example would be, "Yes, you're right. I don't always listen closely to what you have to say."

6. Workable compromise: when you feel that your self-respect is not in question, consider a workable compromise with the other person. You can always bargain for your material goals unless the compromise affects your personal feelings of self-respect. However, if the end goal involves a matter of your self-worth and self-respect, THERE CAN BE NO COMPROMISE. An example of this technique would be, "I understand that you have a need to talk and I need to finish what I'm doing. So what about meeting in half an hour?"

Conclusion

Assertiveness is a useful communication tool. It's application is contextual and it's not appropriate to be assertive in all situations. Remember, your sudden use of assertiveness may be perceived as an act of aggression by others.

There's also no guarantee of success, even when you use assertive communication styles appropriately.

"Nothing on earth can stop the individual with the right mental attitude from achieving their goal; nothing on earth can help the individual with the wrong mental attitude" W.W. Ziege

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/

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I'd really love to hear from you - just reply to this e-zine and let me know what you think.

Best Regards

Peter

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